July 22, 2003 - 10:30 a.m.

Morning.
Mood:

So rarely do I get to write here this early, but for some reason everyone left and I have a bit of work to do for Red but I'm waiting for the food to digest so I can do abs first, then finish his site. I finished everything else yesterday. Damn, yesterday was a crazy day.

I managed to read Stacy's diary though and I'm a little concerned about her last entry *huggles*. I read everything else as well though and I'm so glad she's happy with Greg. I TRULY understand how she feels when she says a lot of the things she's feeling for him and the way she misses him. She has a very pure heart, so then of course there's the "parent" issue. It seems that by far, the most intelligent, emotional and understanding people USUALLY end up being the children of parents who are the exact opposite. It's hard to survive being like that with ruthless people. People who's primortial instincts have taken over and they refuse to move forward, evolve.

We ARE the minority though. We're the "new" human. Evolved beyond the simple instincts to survive. We understand, we're intuitive. We can sense things others can't, but for that we suffer dearly, and they wonder why we have so many emotional problems? Maybe that's why I want to become a psychologist so badly. To be one of the few in a world full of people who think they can explain it all away with a book, but to be the one who knows that you need to FEEL the person first. And above all, councel people who WANT to be together, give them insight into what I have learned. Give them the tools to "fish for themselves".

Oftentimes I wake up and I wonder, "Where will I go today?". Most days, nothing extravagant happens. Weekends are packed full of fun. I finally feel like I'm having a summer I enjoy (last year was a real disappointment). In two weeks I will possibly go on what is to be the final trip I shall take. Then Seattle one of these days. I'll make Red take off a week from work with me. I just need to ask him for SURE so I can send work people a warning e-mail. Unfortunately no roadtrip, no new car, no dog for me, but I'm still happy. Instead of the roadtrip I will go on a smaller trip, and smaller trips yet strewn inbetween until it's time to head off to school. Instead of the car I want I will drive my mom's car, which is quite sentimental in its own way, and instead of a new doggy to call my own I'll lavish my attention on Bandit, and perhaps it's better this way. Aparently I am meant to wait to have a dog of my own when I move out.

I hope Stacy is all right though *sigh*. I'm so gald she has Greg who can be there for her no matter what. Although I need to comment on the whole "doing stuff for parents" issue. I'm also miffed every time I get called down for something my mom can just as easily do herself, hell, MORE so. Because I need to interrupt what I'm doing, then go downstairs and ask her what the hell she wants. Then it turns out to be something that needs to get done on the first floor about a foot away from her. So I'm like WHAT THE FUCK! You could have done it in like 2 minutes whereas it'll take me 10!

The other thing that pisses me off is her calling me for EVERYTHING. And I mean EVERYTHING. When Red's dad needs something from either one of them he comes all the way downstairs to ask directly. When THEY want something from ME, they yell throughout the entire house and then get pissed off at me because I'm in the bathroom on the other side of the house, with the water running and I can't hear worth shit. I sort of learned not to respond because there's no point. This worked when we lived in a one bedroom apartment but that was a little over 10 years ago for cripe sakes!

I'm not a mean person, but I like efficiency. And to me, wasting 10 minutes of someone else's time while you could do it in 2 is VERY inefficient and inconsiderate. Although, I suppose that's the bottom line: most parents ARE inconsiderate.